“Finding Purpose After Loss”
Bnai Torah Congregation Wednesdays 4:30-5:30 pm
This bereavement/loss group offers loving, compassionate support and helps guide you to move through your journey in life and through the grieving process. As difficult as it may seem, every event can be an opportunity for growth. Open to anyone, but call first.
For more information: Bnai Torah Congregation Elaine Siegell 561-392-8566 Costs $5
“You have meant so much to me and done so much for me with your loving kindness and ultimate professionalism. I am a better person for having you in my life” Linda L.J.
“Several months after my beloved husband passed away, I went to a bereavement session led by Carla Van Walsum, PhD. It was reassuring and moving watching Carla meet the needs of all the people in the group, despite the vastly different situations of the people in attendance. Subsequently, I elected to see Carla privately. I truly look forward to sharing my background, situations, thoughts and feelings with Carla because she has the ability to bring in a wealth of traditional expertise in psychological counseling blended with her deep knowledge of and experience with spirituality. The marriage of Carla’s traditional approach with a deep connection to acknowledging the presence of loving protective souls has enabled me to make regular and encouraging progress in understanding and successfully progressing through my profound grief. Carla’s unique aura of warmth and caring pervades her sessions and the affect lasts long after the visits are complete. “ L.B.W.
Lately, in the bereavement group I am leading, we spoke about “lonesomeness”. If after 50-60+ years of marriage you lose your partner, an entirely new challenge pops up; to take care of your own well being, or to get happy-up-to-certain-degree again. To find purpose for the rest of your life.
One lady, a socially well-known, very respected and widow of two years, said: “I have many friends, I know so many people, but no one calls me up to go out for dinner or to do something”. Another woman in the group said “That is because they are couples”. I replied, “There are so may single people, this is probably not the reason”. If you want something, you must give it first. If you want more love and kindness, just be it and live it. This also works if you want more money, you need to be generous. It is an ongoing cycle. To be wealthy, successful and enjoying it, you need to release all scarcity thinking. To be happy you need to change some beliefs.
“If you feel like you need more company, call up a few of your friends and invite them to do something you all would enjoy”. “Oh no”, one woman said, “Then you might get rejected!” “But that doesn’t matter,” I said. “You can choose to not take that personally. Instead, reject the rejection! Just go for what you want! There are so many people like you who would LOVE to go out and do something fun or would be happy to receive a phone call. “
I see the fear of rejection popping up in every area of life; relationships, work, success. In order to achieve
your aspirations you must be detached to the outcome. To hear “yes” is great, but hearing “no” is fine too. It doesn’t matter. It is one way to help people to manage loneliness, to express their needs without feeling a victim. And it’s especially necessary if they never have learned to ask for what they need.
Another way is to become a little more aware and thoughtful; we all know people who might love to get a phone call… It doesn’t take much to just make that little extra effort for connection. It would bring a little spark in someone else’s life, and maybe inspiring them to do the same! If everyone would think of someone that would be happy to receive a call or visit and would take action, it would brighten the lives of many. This is a really great gift to consider…
“I had such a horrible day, it was very difficult to come. Carla is an excellent facilitator and I feel much better for having made the effort to come.” ~ Julie Walkoff
” It is a special time for me to step back and reflect on my life. A way to share with others…”
“It is a pleasure to spend one hour with you, Carla. It makes me feel good. I look forward all week to come Wednesday here.” ~M. S. (Male)