Abuse


Balance…Do we need it?

Balance. Think about it, everything is built up on the concept of ‘balancing’.You don’t like arrogant, snobby people? Well, the other end of the stick is insecurity…Deep down the ‘arrogants’ are missing out on a profound being at peace with them selves or with life. So, there is no balance… In the middle of the stick you’ll find self-confidence and contentedness with self and the world.  Arrogance and insecurity are absence. A client in one of my couple counseling sessions lately, told me he felt insecure about many things and his wife told him often, while loving him much and very awakened on top of that, what was wrong about him, how childish he was and lacking perseverance.


How to get your needs met without getting angry?

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If the urge to control OTHERS would be recognized as an expression of FEARful thinking, than parents could be much more happy if they communicate their wishes differently. We can never REALLY expect anybody to do something they dont want to comply with, other then using coercion/ threat which is violent.
Being punished or rewarded for every step you take takes away the natural joy and behavior of ‘just doing it’
Requesting respectfully based on compassion and awareness of each others needs creates easy compliance. The model of Crystal Clear Communication is a great tool to realize that. Not to please each other to get something out of it, but to please because it is great to do something for someone else.
The joy of the mitsvah/a good deed. Just a higher level of conscious living.


Trust is a strong component for…

Trust is one strong component for..   ….  healthy-functioning relationships. You might agree with that, but do you also know HOW to create (more) trust in your world or in yourself, especially when you don’t think that trust is highly present in your life?      It could be that as a child you overheard your parents saying to someone else, “I don’t trust that kid at all!” “You can never trust them!”  Or you may have heard some similar expression.   Your subconscious collects all data in your life and determines much of your motivation and behavior. Usually, the negative statements you heard about yourself became part of your identity, and ironically, you most likely are proving its truth in your life. It is a terrible feeling when people don’t trust you for no apparent reason, or when you feel untrustworthy or distrustful.  


’Alicia’, a Systemic Family Constellation

‘Alicia’ “ I love my husband” said Alicia while looking at me, her big dark eyes showing some uncertainty. “But I cannot commit myself fully. I always feel doubt, something is missing. I love our 2 kids, I do not want a divorce either. And now I found the perfect answer, but not the solution. “That means?” I asked. ”Well, I fell in love with another man.”.