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Hidden loyalties and procrastination

Hidden loyalties, procrastination. Everyone has hidden loyalties. This is such an important topic! I will share a little bit, and explain much more, in the upcoming workshop and video that will be posted on FB and YouTube. We all have loyalties to our belief-systems, family members, siblings, ethnicities, nations, grandparents, to the suffering of our ancestors, or to groups of people we may be unaware of. Loyalty, in and of itself, is an extremely important trait in relationships, but as family constellations reveals, it is often connected to self-sabotage. It starts with our loyalty to the ones who gave us life. Today, so many women  live their passion and follow their dreams by creating their own businesses and offering wonderful services. They often live totally different lives then their mothers did. They have  more freedom of choices in many areas of life. However, many times they are not where they would Read More


The Emperor’s New Drugs-Antidepressants

There are many ways to raise your vibration including: thinking positive and uplifting thoughts. What about antidepressants? As a child did you listen to, or read, the story about the Emperor’s New Clothes? Fascinating, wasn’t it? Well, I found a courageous book entitled: The Emperor’s New Drugs, exploding the Antidepressant Myth. Many of you know and believe in the power of the mind and positive thinking. Also, many of you know  that depressions can be part of Epigenetics, “inherited family traumas” as is so frequently evidenced in the systemic family constellation work. In one session the depression can be released, often forever. That means that conscious -and subconscious levels entangle and intertwine. You can try to be positive till you become blue in the face yet still carry, deep down inside, a sense of depressive feelings. Here’s what Irving Kirsch, PhD-psychologist, who for years had been referring his patients to Read More


Anger-Relationships-Family Constellations

You want to be kind. You want to have peace in your home and in your relationships. But how do you achieve that peace when you are so upset that it’s almost unbearable to express your frustration calmly and peacefully? What is happening when someone “loses it” and turns into another person? The Kabbalah teaches that when a person gets into a rage, the soul leaves temporarily. Your higher self seems not to feel comfortable with uncontrollable rage. One third of the Americans seem to walk on eggshells; fearing a partner (or child) who gets inflamed too easily. However, anger is a trigger notifying you that something isn’t right, a sort of wake-up call. That means you are invited to spend time for reflection and action. But before you take action, release the anger! One cause for anger is the way we think as the Crystal Clear Communication model explains. We project Read More


Ancestors can still influence you today.

ancestors, transgenerational trauma Are you open to discover how your ancestors still might affect your behavior today? Are you willing to stop worrying about what the world wants from you and willing to make it your job and your life purpose to fully live, love and feel every precious moment of your life? (Not easy, right?) Did you ever realize that “worrying” is a HABIT, most often inherited from your family? Imagine, your ancestors might have experienced extreme violence, even for centuries. Then they moved to the USA to be free. Today your family lives in a relatively safe situation. But the habit of worrying can still exist. Even if there’s nothing to worry about. Do you realize that by living in  FEAR  your stamina gets low, your immune system is negatively effected and your serotonin productivity is inhibited? If you are one of those “worriers”, here are some tips. Challenge Read More


Alicia, a Family Constellation

Alicia. Family Constellations “I love my husband” said Alicia while looking at me, her big dark eyes showing some uncertainty. “But I cannot commit myself fully. I always feel doubt, something is missing. I love our 2 kids, I do not want a divorce either. And now I found the perfect answer, but not the solution. “That means?” I asked. ”Well, I fell in love with another man.”. Alicia had come “to set up a family constellation” in order to get more insight about herself. “Ok, I have enough information” I said. “Ask someone to represent you, your father and your mother.” “Not my husband??” “No, not yet”. She chose a few people from the audience, moved them to a specific spot in the room, in the so called ‘morpho genetic field’, and, voila! there the picture was revealed. In this constellation the represented father was placed three yards away Read More


If you loose a parent…

Loss, grief, family constellations This morning  I was teaching again a 3 hour class in Palm Beach State College. One of the things that became clear was the visible connection with feeling ” Fearful of Success” as a result of a criticizing childhood. Not much Self-love and  self-appreciation, and feeling not-good enough were the biggest blocks with a specific, well-educated client. The shifts as were  occurring today promisse trust in a more self-actualizing future. Much gratitude to all! Here below is 1 example of private sessions  and workshops with the constellation-method. Generational patterns /Transferred traumas/Epigenetics. “My husband sometimes cheats on me, he says that he really loves me and doesn’t want to divorce, and it just drives me crazy!” Linda looked at me with deep sadness. “Did he lose a parent at a young age?”  This is usually the first question I ask with these kind of matters. Why? Because as Bert Hellinger (Hellinger 2001) so greatly Read More


Which intentions do You choose:

What are you choosing for the new year: intentions or resolutions? I love intentions rather than resolutions. Why? Intentions seem to be inspirational, stress-free and are connected to your soul, your core. 11 years ago, when I moved from Europe to Florida with my husband and 3 young children, I left behind a flourishing beautiful world, with many deep, loving friendships. Though I am still in touch with many, it was a huge loss to go through. To make our endeavor an enriching challenge, I set forward the intention of “only meeting wonderful people.” And I truly, truly did!!! Resolutions put you on the spot.They create stress. If you quit your newly made resolutions, you feel disappointed in yourself or powerless. How often are the failed resolutions put back on the agenda the next year? Intentions are positive motivators but without action are not worth that much. Procrastination can be Read More


Success Acceleration

Success, empowerment. Almost everybody wants to be successful. Success is actually a concept that encompasses  all areas of life. However, if you ask 10 people what success means to them you’ll get 10 totally different answers. According to Wikipedia success is: Attainment of higher social status Achievement of a goal, for example academic success   The opposite of failure   How simplistic is that! Those answers are a little superficial and mainly extrinsic. Yes, you can achieve a higher social status, that’s usually the result of academic and financial success.  What is this success? How others value and look at you?  Who cares what your neighbors think anyway? Unfortunately, yes, many do care and those thoughts keep them from being successful in some  other areas of life. The root cause is that they are depending on approval of others. I believe that feeling truly successful is something that you FEEL inside and is Read More


One secret of a great relationship is balance…

Great relationship Jen, a client, came into my office totally upset. Her partner didn’t want to join her today in the session. He was angry because of what Jen said to him, and he was “done”.  At least, that’s the excuse he used.  “I told him that he was a real narcissist and that he listened too much to his ego and never to me.” “Well, if you attack him, for sure he won’t listen to you.  First, never express your frustration by attacking someone. You bring in attack and defense mechanisms from the courtroom; this is not a great arena for compassionate relationships. When attacked, no one will listen to what is really hidden behind the words… There is no compassionate, heartfelt connection at that moment.  Second, if you are hurt do not hurt back, but EXPRESS your feelings and needs.”


What do you prefer, respect or…

RESPECT? “He’s never going to raise his voice to his parents! ” The very gentle, nice father appeared very decided. “That’s what I learned from my parents,” he said. The very gentle, nice father appeared very decided. I looked at his wife and she nodded her head in agreement. “Ok,” I said” I get that.” “Do you ever yell at your son? “Sometimes…,” the father answered. “Often” the mom answered very honest. “Well, then you lost your right to demand that your kids will never yell at you. Because…what they learned from you is that when you are frustrated and angry you yell! That’s the way you show them to behave when you are upset! And…for children in general, it’s much harder to control their emotions, just because they are kids. So if you can’t…” The parents looked up pretty confused. I continued: “If you punish as you did, and Read More